Life after cancer.........it has been interesting to say the least. The best part about cancer is you gain many pink sisters! They are other women going through the same thing you are and you know they know and understand. They look you square in the eye (because I have had some people who won't look you in the eye) as if to say "I know......me too." It helps to know you are not in the battle alone. And so I have made it through my 6 month checkup......cancer free.......for now.
And the reason why I say for now is because there is now always a chance the cancer can return. And this nagging thought that will never go away, is very hard to live with. My small group has prayed with me so that this thought alone would not consume me or take control. I have read some women are so terrified of the cancer returning that they become paralyzed and stuck in their worry of return, so much so that they quit living. This is not me.
Cancer teaches you to live in the moment, no matter how hard that moment is. You might be experiencing pain or hurt, but the ROCK of Ages has HIS hand upon you. HE will either heal you or not, but you know HE is there, walking through with you.
JOSHUA 1:5 "JUST AS I WAS WITH MOSES, SO I WILL BE WITH YOU. I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU."
What a comfort to know.......to know HE is there with you. Yes my LORD was with me before the cancer and through the cancer and after.........HE WAS THERE and still is! Because my GOD has given me the courage to walk into the hardest thing I have ever had to experience in my life. So believe me, if any pink sister is reading this and you are a faithful dear child of GOD, HE is faithful, because HE is a great GOD! Don't doubt for one minute that HE will abandon you. You will see the evidence of HIS hand and provision, just because you are so desperate to find it and to know HE is there with HIS loving capable guidance and provision.
I've learned that I am stronger than I thought, but even stronger because of GOD. So many times I prayed for GOD to give me the strength to go into an operating room or another radiation treatment. And when I was sure that I couldn't, GOD gave me HIS courage to face what was in front of me. Of course HE came through, because HE does HIS best work when we are completely dependent and broken. Remember, a bruised reed HE will not break.
ROMANS 4: 16 "THAT IS WHY IT DEPENDS ON FAITH, IN ORDER THAT THE PROMISE MAY REST ON GRACE AND BE GUARANTEED TO ALL HIS OFFSPRING."
And I so often rested in HIS grace.......and the grace of others. HE sent the sweetest friends around me to support me in any way they could. There were many prayers said over me and even some friends visited me and stayed with me, just to see me after cancer. That touched my heart the most, that those sweet friends needed to be with me and to love on me.
And so I am living now in the after and the unknown, but the fear is not there, only the peace of GOD. HE will never abandon me, cancer or not. And that is a very real comfort. I can move forward and not be terrified of cancer or any other disease that could come my way. Today I cling to HIS truth and I cling to HIS goodness and strength. Dear one, if you are a cancer survivor, or if you are in the battle, I pray you will cling to GOD too in any way you can. HE is always faithful, loving and true!
MATTHEW 11: 28 "COME TO ME, ALL YOU WHO ARE WEARY AND BURDENED, AND I WILL GIVE YOU REST."
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