I've missed you guys! I'm doing something new, giving you the platform! I'll start with the series "The Bride of Christ Breaking Free" and the raw truth of our battles in this world, no sugar coating necessary:) It's tough out there, Christian or not.
Part 1- "The Rushed Testimony" by Anonymous, age range, 20-30's.
"As a culture, I've noticed that we obsess over testimony a little too much, meaning that when something terrible happens to us, whether it is self-inflicted or devil-inflicted, we're so quick to justify the means and try to get healing and absolution, so that we can have a testimony to share with people. We rush to get there, but we don't fully heal. We don't fully understand what happened; we just go and tell the masses what happened. And it's like--hurry up and heal so we can preach about it! Somewhere down the line, this has morphed into a form of self-righteousness. Not all believers do this, but enough to damage the perception of Christ's nature to believers and non-believers.
We preach and share testimonies: seasons of struggle and trauma for glory, but the glory isn't focused on Christ; it's focused on us. Look what I went through; woe is me, but look how strong I am. But praise God, thank the Lord for His mercy.
This isn't to say we deserve credit for our effort in perseverance, for Christ does want us to be proud of ourselves when transformative work is accomplished, but He must stay at the center.
The majority of the time, due to our ego and negligence to face insecurity and offense, we put ourselves in traumatic situations that the devil doesn't even need to partake in. We do all the work already, then we shake our fists at the sky, angry that God doesn't deliver us, yet we're the ones holding the gun to our heads. Then, a half-conceptualized and pieced-together testimony is thrown around, and we subconsciously expect praise for our sufferings to be validated and valued by other people. Because of this subtly dangerous mentality, we, as a modern church community, have weaponized trauma and sought out self-righteous suffering hidden under the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Years ago, I felt as if my rehab journey was rushed so that my struggle with addiction could be a testimony to anyone who was bothered to listen. It was all about: "You'll help so many people with your testimony once you've completed the therapy," and this and that. I remember my family would tell other people about what I was going through, and this changed the way those people saw me. I was perceived differently. Silently judged. Feared. Maybe questionable. How does a believer of Christ become a...drug addict?
I went to rehab for an addiction that I chose to cope with, for cruel things that were said and done to me that I didn't deserve. But yet, the conversation only shifted to my testimony's potential success--from the church's perspective. A testimony that didn't exist at that moment but was expected and demanded. To be honest with you? That testimony shouldn't exist at all. There are battles we can avoid--stories and lessons that don't need to be created. We've twisted brokenness into bragging rights and testimonies into torture."
Context: Young Bride of Christ struggling with life, multiple suicide attempts as a result of a toxic mother, an enabling father, and unfulfilled, empty church teachings. Blame was put upon this young Bride of Christ to be demon-possessed. Further, blame was spit in hate over the years regarding just about everything. As a result, this Bride of Christ walked away from Christ and lingered in the valley of shadows for some years until it found its way back to Christ. The return is strong, the healing is confirmed, the joy is present, and the reunion is celebrated. However, the old ways of church culture are not what did this.
My input: (even if not needed). Please think how many times you cursed and cussed the enemy that caused you harm, out loud or otherwise. It hasn't been all "Praise the Lord," kumbaya; I got this. I'm sure there have been a few #$%&% and *^^%# words and attitudes embedded in that testimony because we're imperfect humans. Letting go must start somewhere, and realizing you're not alone in the muck and the downright filthy pits of darkness is where we begin. God starts a relationship with you between your snotty and salty teary meltdowns. Yes, we all mess up; we're all imperfect versions of humanity, so stop photoshopping your testimony for the sake of a higher rate of approval. I'm sure homeless people can teach us more than most preachers who've never had to eat out of a garbage can. Most of us have never truly felt discarded, mocked, ignored, trashed, and invisible. As the Bride of Christ, we should be real with each other, even if we don't like it. Truth is better.
God Bless:)
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